Haunted
© Akua Allrich
I have sold my soul to the devil to survive
thus I am haunted by my own spirit
haunted by my own livelihood
by my own past
I live a life that requires me to be dead
the confusion that has made me is too profound
it is now
my system,
my order,
my existence
my spirit haunts me
for my father sold his soul to deception,
my mother’s to defeat
them both to unrighteousness
all so that mine would be saved
it did not work
I hear voices that I can not explain
I do not understand my own mind
dream,
reality
a collision
conflict
there lies no bridge no equilibrium, no center of gravity
no system enough to reveal
divulge
elucidate
clarify the course
they both fight to be free of me
as do I of them
my numerous dis-eases are the product of my haunting
I am haunted by the life that I should lead
I am haunted by the ancestors I have not learned
I am haunted by a past that should have been my future
I am haunted
I am haunted
I am haunted
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